It is currently Mon Oct 20, 2014 6:46 pm

All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 9 posts ] 
Author Message
 Post subject: My new story and character......Wheelman
PostPosted: Mon Sep 20, 2010 10:27 pm 
Offline
The Brains & The Brawn
The Brains & The Brawn

Joined: Tue May 27, 2008 12:37 am
Posts: 485
As a writer with CP, Ive tried a bunch of.....angles.....I guess you could say......to write a story about someone with a disability that shatters the mold of what a character with a disability should be like...

I started with a "Boyhood Friends" "Stand By Me"esque story but scrapped it for this idea, its an action story, in the veins of Daredevil, Batman, James Bond, and throw in a touch of The Ousiders and other greaser stories. Theres only a little action so far as the characters are still being established, but tell me what you think

And now, the "first ten minutes" so to speak, I humbly present........Wheelman!




WHEELMAN

Prologue
This is an action story…. You know the kind, guy gets into incredible situation, has to face unimaginable threat, lots of explosions, lots of flash, guy gets the girl in the end, yeah, it’s one of those stories. The thing about this particular story is that it that our hero is probably not the quote unquote hero people imagine, you know the kind…007, Jason Bourne, Spiderman, Luke Skywalker, but don’t be fooled by our heroes exterior…….many people did, and many people are very, very sorry.











I
In New York, a household was glowing in the dusky evening. Inside, dinner plates and silverware clinked and clanked.
Phyliss Miller was a stern yet warm 65 year old woman, her grey hair pulled tightly in a bun. She was the head of a household that consisted of 10 kids, all with some sort of disability. The oldest was David Columbia, he had Cerebral Palsy, he had grown up in this group home, he attended regular school as his limitations were strictly physical.
“Let’s discuss our day shall we?”
“I cau- I caught a b – b –“
“Slow down Tim, you caught a..?”
“b- b- b-“
“spit it out stupid”
“MARY!TO YOUR ROOM NOW! Now, what did you catch?”
“a butterfly!” the 7 year old boy grinned, “Now I pick……David”
“Oh, well, I uh,-“ his cell phone rang and he looked at a text message
“I have to go, Miss Miller, I have to study at the library”
“Oh, OK then, everyone say goodbye to David” The 9 other kids murmured their goodbyes.
Now I think you can guess as well as Miss Miller could that the library was not in David’s immediate future. She understood that David needed his space; after all, he was an adult now. “Going to the library” was more of a code phrase that the 2 had developed.
He kissed Phyllis and wheeled into the night, he went past the other houses in the quaint neighborhood in Queens until he came to a black SUV.
“There you are!”
“Sorry, man” He got in the SUV as his best friend Mike loaded his wheelchair in the back
“So are you ready?”
“I never am”
“Yet you never cease to crush the opponent! ‘Oh, look at the poor wheelchair kid, I can’t hit hhim, then POW!”
“I get it, Mike!”
They drove to a small flight of stairs and Mike helped David down before carrying the wheelchair down, inside the MMA fight club a crowd jeered as two men grappled with each other. Mike wheeled David to a back room where he got ready
“Who am I fighting?”
“Some punk from the East Side, thinks he’s a big man”
“Beating on people in wheelchairs?”
Mike laughed, “Yeah, I guess”
10 minutes later, both men entered the ring



II
Standing before David was a burly man, he was tall, with hair down to his shoulders. He raised his arms as if to say “What is this”

“Is this a joke? You? I‘m fighting you?”
“Looks like it”
“I can’t fight a cripple!”
“Well that will make things easy for me I guess”
The man hesitantly approached David and looked at him
“You really want to do this?”
“Yup”
O……K, sorry for this”
The man threw a hook punch which David dodged and responded by throwing his knee crushing into the man’s gut. The man keeled over and was greeted by a slamming punch to the man’s cheek causing the man’s head to turn 90 degrees and blood to spray from his mouth. The man stumbled back three steps and fell. He got up, his shirtless torso glistening and heaving, his teeth red. The man lunged towards David and threw three more strikes all of which were dodged. David could feel the air shooting past his cheeks. He quickly wheeled back and was greeted by a flying kick, David spun his chair sideways causing the man to kick through the Pepsi advertisement behind him’
He threw three spinning front kicks, all of which David avoided by ducking. The man was now gasping for air, David slammed his footrests into the man’s shins, threw a side elbow into his gut, and finished by delivering an uppercut to the man’s jaw. The man collapsed
“Daaaaang!” the announcer exclaimed
“Nice fight” Mike said as David greeted him.
“Thanks, hey I’m thirsty, you?”
“yeah








III
The 10:00 rush filled The Neon Olive, a small dive mainly inhabited by bikers. The bar was mainly lit by neon beer advertisements, and filled with smoke. David and Mike sat at a booth, both had beers in front of them.
“Man, you nailed that guy!”
“He nailed himself, I just sat and watched”
“So how much did you make?”
“$500”
“Niiice”
“So, what’s up?”
“I just, I don’t know, I’ve been….thinking”
“Oh dear God! That’s never a good thing!”
“I just…..” He swigged his beer
“I- I feel……..trapped…….sometimes…..yknow?”
“Yeah”
“I feel like….I just need…….. to take a Greyhound……… and get the hell out of here.”
“It’s called growing up”
“Forget it, let’s just get the tab”
“Nah, I hear you man! You wanna do it? You wanna get the hell out of here? Yeah, let’s go!”
David paused for a few a seconds
“What…… now?”
“Yeah, we get our crap and go!” another pause
“OK, I just need to say goodbye to Miss Miller”
“She’ll be OK with this?”
“I hope…..”












IV
“WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?! ITS NEARLY 1AM!: Phyliss was awaiting David on the front porch
“I was talking with Mike”
“I told you that boy was trouble”
“I’m 20 FREAKIN YEARS OLD!”
“You watch that mouth!” Phyliss snapped
“Y’know what we were talking about? Huh? Getting out of here!”
“You want to leave? Is that it? Go!”
“I will!”
“You won’t make it a day out there…For God’s sakes look at you!”
BANG!



Out of nowhere a gun shot, Phyliss looked down to see a small wound in her chest, she fell, lifeless
“Oh my God!......... Oh my God!” David couldn’t breathe
“Phyliss…..no!” he held her and began sobbing
V: 1 YEAR LATER…
David sat on the couch in an apartment he and Mike bought in upper Manhattan with David’s prize fighting money. He was eating popcorn and playing Super Mario Bros. 3 on his old Nintendo game system that he had at the grouphome. Mike had gotten work at Givano’s Pizza as a waiter. David continued fighting and also found work at tech support, answering phone calls and giving people computer advice. He had always had a knack for computers. Mike entered the apartment.
“Hey”
“How was work?”
“Work, give me some of that popcorn.”
“Want a turn?”
“I’m good….” There was an awkward silence “Mario huh?” he chuckled, “You always did love Mario”
“Yep”
“Do you maybe wanna……..go out to eat?”
“I guess”
Mike pushed David as they went down a busy street in Manhattan. Walking by them was a girl about their age. Men in grey hoodies suddenly approached her.
“Hey baby” A man grabbedher , she struggled
“Let’s have some fun”
“Get off me!!!!” she screamed
“Hey!” David yelled, “That’s enough, let her go!”
“Or what?”
“Or I’ll make you!”
The other men gasped, the man threw the girl to the ground, and walked toward David, laughing, he pulled a knife
“OK, cmon tough guy!” he slashed at David several times, David dodged.
“Wow! That’s not bad!” said the man. He slashed a few more times until David grabbed his arm making him drop the knife, he then kicked him in the groin. In pain, the man retreated.
Another man walked towards David smiling, he pulled a 9mm pistol from his pocket and laughed to himself


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: My new story and character......Wheelman
PostPosted: Tue Sep 21, 2010 1:36 am 
Offline
Aheeheeheehee
Aheeheeheehee
Group: Sidekick
Group: BETA
User avatar

Joined: Thu Oct 15, 2009 10:01 pm
Posts: 1798
Location: PARKDALE PE BABY
very exciting post the rest

_________________
Bludgeoned to Death


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: My new story and character......Wheelman
PostPosted: Tue Sep 21, 2010 3:43 pm 
Offline
The Brains & The Brawn
The Brains & The Brawn

Joined: Tue May 27, 2008 12:37 am
Posts: 485
Thats all I got so far


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: My new story and character......Wheelman
PostPosted: Tue Sep 21, 2010 4:30 pm 
Offline
Aheeheeheehee
Aheeheeheehee
Group: Sidekick
Group: BETA
User avatar

Joined: Thu Oct 15, 2009 10:01 pm
Posts: 1798
Location: PARKDALE PE BABY
well its good can not wait to read the rest!

_________________
Bludgeoned to Death


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: My new story and character......Wheelman
PostPosted: Tue Sep 21, 2010 7:55 pm 
Offline
The Brains & The Brawn
The Brains & The Brawn

Joined: Tue May 27, 2008 12:37 am
Posts: 485
Thanks!:)


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: My new story and character......Wheelman
PostPosted: Wed Oct 13, 2010 11:38 pm 
Offline
Aheeheeheehee
Aheeheeheehee
Group: Sidekick
Group: BETA
User avatar

Joined: Thu Oct 15, 2009 10:01 pm
Posts: 1798
Location: PARKDALE PE BABY
Did you write the rest yet?

_________________
Bludgeoned to Death


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: My new story and character......Wheelman
PostPosted: Sun Oct 17, 2010 6:46 pm 
Offline
The Brains & The Brawn
The Brains & The Brawn

Joined: Tue May 27, 2008 12:37 am
Posts: 485
not yet...


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: My new story and character......Wheelman
PostPosted: Wed Dec 08, 2010 12:38 am 
Offline
The Brains & The Brawn
The Brains & The Brawn

Joined: Tue May 27, 2008 12:37 am
Posts: 485
IV
David and Jen, the girl who David had rescued, sat in a booth at a coffee shop. Mike had gone to work.
“I just wanted to thank you again, David. God, I thought I was a super strong feminist and I just find myself playing the damsel.”
“Well, you never know I guess”
“No, I guess you don’t…. But you kicked ass! How, I mean…….”
“I, I trained in a Shaolin monastery” Jen looked at David like he might have been serious, then they both busted out laughing.
“No, I just, I hate being the victim, it just perpetuates the “helpless disabled person” stereotype.”
“Yeah, no one thought that today”
“Sooo, will I offend this strong feminist by saying you are really cute?”
Jen laughed “Nah, it’s all good!” They laughed, then slowly leaned towards each other and kissed.
“So, can I walk you home?”
“Yeah…that sounds great!”





V
“So you got yourself a little girlfriend?” Mike and David drove down the road
“I guess, Jen’s awesome”
“Did you-“
“No Mike” David cut Mike off
“I’m just sayin”
“Is that all you think about?”
“I’m a dude”
“….true”


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: My new story and character......Wheelman
PostPosted: Mon Jan 10, 2011 11:49 pm 
Offline
The Brains & The Brawn
The Brains & The Brawn

Joined: Tue May 27, 2008 12:37 am
Posts: 485
continuing the same scene.....

“So Peter Parker, when do you fight your next bad guy?”
“I’m not trying to play hero here, Mike, look, she was in trouble, I helped.”
“That’s not playing hero?”
“No, well, I mean, I don’t know”
“Yeah, it is”
David searched for the right words, “I’m not…..I mean…just…….forget it”
The SUV pulled back into the parking lot of the apartment complex. Dacid and Mike went inside and got their mail
“Bill, bill, bill, junk, wait whats this?” Mike read through the pile


VI
It was a manila envelope, fairly large, a ringing sound came from inside, David opened it, revealing a cell phone
“Um…….h e l l o?”
“I know that your mother was shot, I also know that you are in danger”
“Who the hell is this?”
“That’s not important, whats important is your safety”
“Wha-?”
“Just, listen to me David, they know where you are”
“Who?”
click
“Who? WHO?.........” no response
“DAMN IT!”
“Who was that?”
“I don’t know……..Mike we gotta go”
“Why?”
“Just, trust me”





VII
The jet black Silverado sped down the interstate, the the early morning sun sun shown bright against the pavement. Mike and David sat there, they didn’t move, they didn’t talk. David had been examining the cell phone for a while now, turning it over and over in his hands All of the sudden it rang, scaring both David and Mike half to death.
“H-hello”
“Rise and shine, David”
“We’re on the interstate”
“Good, now keep going until you receive another call”
“What? Who is this?”
“Watch out behind you”
The two boys felt a sudden jolt, Mike sped up as a sports car was tailing them. The car chased the SUV.
“Who the hell are these guys?” Mikes voice was shaking
“I don’t know, I don’t know”
The phone rang again
“Theres a gun in the dash tray”
David took out a pistol
“How did that get in there? Is that yours???”
"No, but it’s here and I need it”
David took the gun and fired at the oncoming car, he could see the red paintchips fly off and the car swerve
“KEEP IT STEADY!”
He reloaded and shot another clip at the car, the car swerved into a ditch. The cell phone rang
“What the hell was THAT?!”
“Looks like you can handle yourself”
“You are seriously freaking me out! Who is this? What do you want?”
“To keep you alive”
“Why? Why me?”
Suddenly the car stopped
“What?” Mike turned the key, pushed the pedals, nothing, a fume came from the air vents, everything went dark…


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 9 posts ] 

All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group